Here is a great article from Tom Bandy.
Imagine. It is almost 11:00 on Friday night when the phone rings. Your neighbor is calling in a panic. He is not particularly religious, but he knows that you go to church regularly. In a rush of words he tells you that his daughter is being held in conversation by his wife on their cell phone. The daughter is away to college, very depressed, and threatening suicide. Sure, they know that there is counseling available in the morning. They even know there is a hotline for emergencies. But before any of that can be useful, they have to keep her alive for a few hours. This is the problem. Your neighbor doesn?t know what to say. He figures you do. You?re religious. Surely you have a message that can keep someone from killing themselves in the next 20 minutes? So what do you say?
Read the rest of the article here.
If you want to take a shot at stating your core message, please do so in the comments.
Telling Stories, Asking Questions, Learning Lessons
10 words? No way. I think this is what I would say, but I’m doing it off the cuff in the spirit of the exercise:
The world is filled with so much beauty: amazing features in nature, the love so many people have. Even in the darkest night, morning’s close by. And it’s no accident – we were created to enjoy this world and each other. Can we show you some of this beauty? Right now or tomorrow, it’s all there for us.
Yeah it’s cliched. Never been in this situation (and hope I never have to be), but wanted to play your game.
On the core message thought, I get his point, but worry a bit about his example because of the misleading information on those threatening suicide, that we can somehow reason with them or be caring enough and get the person to avoid the action. Not to say it doesn’t work in a few situations, but for the most part I would say it doesn’t.
I have actually been in this situation. I spent a tour of duty as a volunteer police chaplain. First, I would say that suicide situations are nothing to fool around with. With all due respect to the article hat you referenced, (and I know he is using this illustration just to make a point), none of these approaches are even close to what needs to be done in this situation. If the parents know her location, they need to get an emergency service person there ASAP. All the caring words or clever words in the world are generally no good in most of these situations. The fact that she has called her parents is encouraging and says she wants to be helped, but getting her away from the threatening situation is the first priority. A police officer or emergency service worker like an EMT can get the job done.
All that being said, one of the most memorable situations that I faced was a high school student who was threatening to jump from a third story building. An officer and I went to the top of the building and established rapport with this student. In his case this was an extremely perilous situation because he was leaning out over the building and rocking back and forth as if he would jump any minute. In this situation one of the things that made the difference was speaking to the student in calm tones and expressing care for him and letting him know that we would do everything within our power to see that he got immediate help and attention to help him with his problem. The police officer was extremely gifted in working with people in these situations. He even had a son who was troubled much like this young man. He managed to get close enough to the young man to put his arm around his shoulder and get him turned toward the exit to the roof of the building. That’s why I say getting an emergency service person to the scene that is familiar with this type of situation is critical.
On the core message, I think we need to get our core attidue changed before we can ever get the message to those who need to hear it.
Peace.
“Believe on the Lord Jesus and you will be saved.”
You are loved!
There is a God. He loves you. He knows about your pain and feelings of helplessness. He has a plan for your life that includes a purpose far greater than you can imagine. You can have hope and peace and joy. I know. He’s done that for me. We don’t have to figure it out on our own. He sent someone to show us the way and even gave us a group of folks to support us on the journey. You are not alone. God is here and in control. Can I come get you? Maybe we could talk some more.
someone needs to be with you i will… right now.
Thanks for the article.
You aren’t alone. Your life matters. Remind her that her parents love her and would be devastated by her death, and that she knows that or she wouldn’t have called to get them to talk her out of it. (If she hasn’t already done it, she probably wants to be talked out of it anyway) I would also tell her that even though she feels an emptiness in her life, that does not mean her life is empty and God can fill that emptiness, be a constant comfort, and give her the peace that can’t be found anywhere else.